why care?

The ironic thing about care: affective and effective motivation may sometimes fall into mutual exclusion. On the one had sustained emotion indicates (though probably doesn't cause) a situation where behavior will be controlled by certain outcomes. So vital is the state where we may move with great passion toward those interests that our human affections support! On the other hand, the same scenario might mean that the "self" will revert to coercive strategies when progression toward the "desired" fails or slows. How many of us have ruined our most avid cares with the destructive power of dread and desire? How intimate is escape with fulfillment?

I fail yet to discern a fault line between the want and the successful reward (success defined as controlling of the organism and adaptive to the beloved), though the world might yet be holding it firm and still and uncaresssed. I feel the tingling desire to touch it - to dance in understanding rather than blindness with the one that lends "meaning" to the other. Sort of a Russian doll game. One can sympathize with the mystics when such paradoxes arise.

As always, sensitivity to incremental pleasure nicely swells to the exact proportions of the void. Find a place where care controls (or is co-controlled) in one direction only - find the contingencies that not only liberate us from desire but also bestow upon us the single-minded ecstasy of the fact: a rare world is ready for revolution but now is, irrespectively, always the time for better in every frame. (Oh my little animal! - At the least here grows your comfort if not also your answer: the dynamic flow of a fourth dimension and its parent pressures... the cataclysmic fluid that comes from that sacred union... it is evolution and motion itself, not the forms that appear to make it up. Transformation: the illusion and the fact and the chaos - that is my life. We are each a population and a wave. I wish I could tell them that time didn't chain us as we always thought it did. We can each anticipate with every motion the approach of the sweet consummation of every inevitable reinforcement, and thereby will each moment be filled with the power of that selector. And each moment we can meet a new animal.)

I've come to realize that many tears are to be tasted and kissed with loving gratitude. As always, the form of a thing has little importance. It is function that is life. And transformation. Always.